I SHALL SHARE MY SILENCE WITH THE WORLD!

By: B -- 8/18/06

Delivered to my day-job inbox every morning is Buzzwhack’s “Buzzword of the Day,” an e-mail usually consisting of a definition of some made-up term that’s being thrown around the business world. An example is “Zidaned: Removed for doing something butt-headed.” Get it? Ha.

Most days it’s a lighthearted (if forgettable) definition, but a recent Buzzword entry stuck out as particularly odd: “Blogger: Someone with nothing to say writing for someone with nothing to do.”

Pretty gutsy statement to make about perhaps the most influential medium to arise in the last generation, wouldn’tcha say?

Those who know me will assume the statement made me angry. It did not.

My love for bloggers knows no bounds, yet Buzzwhack’s definition is so outdated, so preposterous, that my first reaction wasn’t anger. I actually felt sympathy; the same sort of sympathy I feel for people who continue to rail against any old sort of quickly-emerging technology. Most anti-tech luddites (the same people who scoff at the very idea of blogs) aren’t complaining for any logical reason; they complain because they’re scared.

Scared of change, scared that the world is passing them by while they desperately clutch their cordless phones and newspapers with a tear in their eye, shaking their fist at the people speeding past them. Being unable to accept that blogs are more than just a passing fad strikes me as a particularly depressing brand of pathetic.

But the most asinine part of that definition is the “nothing to say” part. ‘Scuse me for pointing out the obvious here, but … if someone had nothing to say, there is no way in hell they’d take the time to create and maintain a blog. What would be the point? I know plenty of people with nothing to say; not one of them has expressed an interest in translating that silence onto the web. Bloggers have nothing to say? Does anyone else on Earth actually believe that? Good golly. I feel like I’m taking crazy pills.

Imagine someone claiming that any person who enjoys snapping photos doesn’t want to remember anything. Buzzwhack’s “blogger” definition is precisely that ridiculous.

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